"They said Hindustan has pre…. fo.. th.. fin… attack on the vata……first this was commu and now the.. atta…they don’t wan us to be aliv Sakina, they don’t…our love wil peris in their parochial acts…",Nawaj hobbled holding my hand. We sat under a neem tree in a Ustad Jamil Baug, Ustad Jamil was famous for his skills on tabla in all over Pakistan and was teacher to Jakir Hussain, the famous Indian Tabla maestro .My hand was very cold and fear of our love was running through my blood,I looked in Nawaj’s eye their was integral fear in his eyes ,of his love and of his past, his past of being an JeM agent.
Nawaj was barely fifteen when his father past away leaving behind him three younger sisters, he was the sole working hand left in the family .Hardly had he finished his schools .he started wondering about the empty stomach in the family. He got a pull- carter on rent and started working day and night shifts in market place, the place mostly run by Sunnis. The 100 Rs. of work could hardly meet for two time meal and so he worked harder and harder to improve their life. The wheels of life began to roll and Khala Jamila was very happy with his son Nawaj. Now they could have good amount of meat and a Bollywood movie on Friday with the family. I, the neighbor of Nawaj could hear the voice of happiness behind the walls. Life was like a canvass of oil paints for Nawaj where he drew wonderful paintings in his life with me beside him. One summer Khala along with her daughters insisted to visit India to their relatives, Nawaj could not refused them but he preferred to stay at home. No sooner did they reach in India news of massacring of Muslims in India spread in the world. Nawaj started sobbing in his house like he got intuitions of his family. He received a wire the next day about death of his family, I condolence him taking him in my arms and that was the last time I felt the warmth of his body.
From that day onwards he was not seen in the streets of Peshawar. I missed my love in lonely time ,I could felt his hands haring me ,I could see his smile beaming at me. I thought I lost him till a day, I saw a man firing in open at Indian Army, and the air was difficult to grasp then, after a week of that firing Nawaj was seen again at the streets of Peshawar. I cornered him at the end of the street some shopwallah gave me a disapproving look, but I did not care for my love, did I.I took his hand and soon headed to the closed door of his house. He revealed me his misdeeds and JeM, he told about provoking videos, his training, family, mission and his life at gunpoint. He told me how he feared at that time, life’s view ,closing door from heaven and somebody shouting at him to join, all the definition of happiness flushing out from the mind and the reality coming into picture that life is all about love and that is why he had come to Peshawar to see me and to marry me. He told me his hard way learned lessons and the sinful act which created hundreds of Nawaj but now he wished to clear his sins by spreading love in the people and starting new life all over again with me, with our love. He asked my hand from my Vahid, the Sunni, with prejudices in mind that Vahid would not agree and yes, he did not. I knew in person that Nawaj has changed, but who will listen to a Shia, we the humans have created invisible boundary amongst ourselves. People say, we are in 21st century, a century of equality, a century of religion less but I could observe as far as we moved in future, people more and more coupled to religion and the boundaries. Being the new century woman I eloped with Nawaj, my King, and that was the first time I listened to my conscience.
We got married in Rawalpindi the next day, Nawaj found a job of sales person in a bank and I managed to get myself as a teacher in a school. Wheels of life began to roll once again, we, I and Nawaj were happy once again.
But it seemed this was the way, Allah wanted Nawaj to clear his sins, in my arms, under the attack of our brotherhood Vatan, he was very frightened and did not once tried to look in the sky, he was mumbling something that I could not realize, I asked him what he is talking but he just mumbled and I understand this is the way of Allah punishing him.
